When “They” Don’t Follow Etiquette

We will all hit a day (Who am I kidding? I’m sure it’s already happened…) where you are in a situation where someone does not follow etiquette for some reason. It could be because of a myriad of reasons, really. Maybe it’s because when it comes down to it, they really don’t want to give up a shower for their second child. Maybe they’re too tired to write a thank you note. Maybe simply don’t know how to act in certain situations. Whatever the case may be, you’re faced with a question of your own. How should you act in these situations?

First, I would never recommend directly mentioning the etiquette faux pas to anyone you’re not closely related to. Positive criticism is reserved for certain relationships. So, if you don’t know the person well, assume the thank you note got lost in the mail.

Likewise, when it comes to showers, you always have the option to simply not attend. I would recommend you weigh how close you are with whether or not to attend. If it is a casual acquaintance, I wouldn’t worry about going. If it is a close friend, I, personally, would.

While it should never be mentioned directly to the “rule breaker,” it can be mentioned to someone in their close family, if the opportunity presents itself. You could casually ask if they received a gift. Sometimes the best advice would be to simply forget about it.

Thank being said, I’m a big promoter of educating oneself about etiquette. I believe it is truly important to being part of society. Yes, we could all host our own shower, and we’d still live to see another day (unless you live in the South….Southern mamas are strict on that sort of thing), but etiquette is more than which fork to use. It is a way of showing others are important to you. It’s about promoting respect. Most importantly, it is a way to make everyone feel comfortable in all situations. The English language (or any other) cannot begin to hold all of the ways we express ourselves. So much of what we “say” is interpreted through what we do. Having a set of guidelines assures we’re closer to being on the same page. 🙂 That, in a nutshell, is why I believe etiquette is important to learn.

etiquette definition

As always, thank you for reading.

Author: eglass

I'm a wife to Garrett, mother to two littles and a lover of etiquette.

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