Announcment: Invitations Coming Soon

Y’all. My son is turning four years old. I can barely believe it. As I was looking through Etsy to find an invitation I liked, I kept stumbling across absolutely beautiful bridal and baby shower invitations. However, I noticed a common theme. The registry was written on each and every one of them. I do know that it’s simple and easy. However, I also know that it can look cheap and as though that’s the only reason you’re having a shower.

So, instead of lamenting this problem forever, I decided to take matters into my own hands! Coming soon will be etiquette-approved invitations for all occasions! Bridal, baby, graduation, birthday…you name it! Also, in case you’re wondering, I will have a way to let people know that you are registered without it being the primary focus of the invitation. I’m so excited to bring this to you!

As always, thank you for reading!

 

RSVP Explained

I’ve talked about RSVP, the translation and what it means before, but since then I’ve received questions from people regarding it a little more. More commonly the question is, “When can I back out of an RSVP?” To be honest, only in the event of an emergency. If you receive a “better” invitation, that’s not the appropropriate time to back out of an RSVP’d event.

Backing out after accepting an invitation is telling your would-have-been hosts that something more appealing came up. By sending a positive RSVP, you are, in truth, forgoing any other options that may be presented to you later. Acceptable cirumstances you would be able to later decline would include becoming sick or having a child or a dependent become sick. It would not include having a friend decide to come to visit last minute or that you received a party invite that seemed more fun.

I know this may all sound harsh, but the truth is, when someone extends you an invitation, they aren’t just trying to fill a seat. They want you there. And it is, to be blunt, rude when you initially accept and then back out once something “better” has come along.

All of that being said, the people who are asking the question are not people I consider rude. I think this is just a case of people living busy lives and time being limited. This is not a generational thing either. It’s a cultural  and societal problem.We glorify busyness for the sake of being busy and think that if you can survive without caffeine, you’re not doing enough. We live in a time where store are open 24/7 so that we are never without. We don’t have to wait for anything, adding to the instant gratification issue. Heaven forbid anyone who has a cell phone not answer a call or text. We are held hostage in our lives.

I say we all deserve better. We deserve months that aren’t so packed with activities that we don’t know what to do with an evening off. Consideration of other people’s time starts with consideration of our own. Do not feel pressured to accept every invitaiton you receive. You don’t need to give a reason. Simply let them know you will not be able to attend. That being said, have respect for any invitation you do accept and make sure to attend.

So, how far out do you need to send your reply? Unless a date is stated, two weeks prior to an event is a solid amount of time to give the hosts time to prepare. Let’s all do our part to send our reply from this point forward. Thank you for reading!

Nicest of Them All….Weddings Decoded

Alright, so earlier this week I asked the question of which type of wedding would be considered the most formal – morning church, evening church, at-home or venue. The answer? It’s actually an at-home wedding. Let’s jump into the “why” that y’all know I’m so eager to always explain?

Now, remember, this is for the USA, and this is actually the traditional etiquette answer, per Amy Vanderbilt and Emily Post. Weddings, by definition, are formal events. This does not equate to formal attire, though. While weddings have been held in churches for centuries, in the USA, it was more common until about the 1950s for weddings to be held at home, provided the bride’s family was wealthy enough to do so. It was considered a very formal affair. Full meals would be provided by servants for hundreds of people. After about the 1820s, families who could afford it went all out for weddings. A minister would still perform the ceremonial part of the wedding, and the reception would commonly follow.

In the 1950s, the USA experienced a religious resurgence with a big push to hold wedding ceremonies in a church building, such as a sanctuary. Still, even then it was popular for the bride’s family to host a full meal and reception at their home or at a family home. As peoples’ homes have decreased in size, the idea of having a receptions at a venue has increased in popularity. In Amy Vanderbilt’s 1954 etiquette book, she declares home weddings “nicest of them all,” showing a preference for tradition over trend. Think plantation home size.

Going by this etiquette precedence, the “nicest” type of wedding and reception a couple would most likely have today would be to have a church wedding and an at-home reception, provided the home is large enough to accommodate a large number of people. It would include a full meal with people serving the meal. An alternative that would be considered just slightly less formal would be a church wedding with a reception at a venue.

Now, if you choose to have a venue wedding, does any of this mean it’s not ok or “nice?” Not even in the least. It is, however, stating that there are certain expectations for choosing a more formal wedding type. That may rub some people the wrong way, but in all areas of life, there are expectations. I have a certain level of expectations when I come to work. Never feel obligated to host any event, including a wedding, that you can’t afford.

Now, going off of the comments, someone mentioned the Royal Wedding between the Duke and Duchess. That, in my opinion, was a perfect combination of old and new. It was a morning church wedding, followed by a luncheon reception. Finally there was an evening “home” reception. The duchess also changed dresses between the events. It was elaborate, but it had an element of youth to it that I loved. She also kept in mind appropriate dress for both venues. As we’ve talked about, the later in the day it gets, the more formal your attire would be. You’d never wear an evening gown to a church, regardless of time, so she kept it before 7 (well before, as it was morning). Prior to the evening event, many of the guests had also changed clothes into more formal threads.

Etiquette helps us to better understand others’ expectations. I hope you enjoyed this post! As always, thank you for reading.

 

It’s Wedding Season!

It’s wedding season! Check out my top picks from Amazon. My kitchen aid mixer is something I use nearly daily, so, even though it’s pricy, we’ve gotten our money’s worth with it.


This post contains affiliate links, and I will earn compensation for any purchase you make after clicking these links.

Special Anniversaries

Mother’s Day 2017 was a double dose of special for me. Not only did I get to celebrate Mother’s Day, but it was also the 6th anniversary of the day Garrett and I exchanged our wedding vows. With the craziness of life, it’s easy to overlook little occasions like that, but I think it’s important for us to stop and enjoy the little things in life.

Initially we didn’t have any big plans to celebrate our anniversary. In our town, a couple is currently about to open a new bed and breakfast – something we’re sorely lacking in Sulphur Springs. They were looking for Guinea pigs and asked if we’d be up for the task. We sure were. J Amazing doesn’t begin to describe the beautiful transformation that has taken place at this once run-down home. It could be in any city or town and fit right in. They outside is stately, and the inside is breathtaking. The details were not overlooked here, and they made us feel like their guests – exactly the feel you want while staying at a bed and breakfast.

We were staying there to review and let them know what might be added before paying guests stay, so I didn’t want to mess up anything at all or put them out in any way. However, when we got to our room (the beautiful bridal suite), there was a bottle of wine and two wine glasses waiting for us. After sharing the evening with friends, we started to forget we were in the same town where we live. There was something wonderful about that moment. The wonderfulness of simply being is often overlooked in favor of the busyness of life. And that’s a cycle I’m going to break.

My husband and I are both bankers, so, financially, we know the risks of keeping up with the Joneses and have no desire to participate. However, socially, we were on a vicious wheel and at risk of falling on that same sword. We are both very involved people, but there are no people on Earth who I love more than my family. I’m ready to get back to relaxed family meals and multiple, slowly read books at bedtime.

One way I choose to slowdown is to better recognize the milestones in our lives. If you’re like me, you may not always remember the traditional anniversary gift ideas, and I thought now would be a good refresher for us all. Enjoy!

By the way, I would highly recommend The Oaks Bed and Breakfast to celebrate your anniversary or to simply have a night away. The breakfast of migas and stuffed brioche french toast was to die for!

1st Paper

2nd Cotton

3rd Leather

4th Linen

5th Wood

6th Iron

7th Wool

8th Bronze

9th Pottery

10th Tin

15th Crystal

20th China

25th Silver

30th Pearl

40th Ruby

50th Gold

60th Diamond